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[doesntsing]

TFLN overflow | General texting | Picture prompts
Lyric/Quote prompts | Random scenario | Whatever you want

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[treblemaking]

So not surprises on the so-called happiest day of your life then, good. Sometimes I hear stories worth of a horror novel.

I don't know, I think it was a very important part of it. Some could even consider it the protagonist, if you will.

[doesntsing]

No. I wanted to make sure that he and I were sexually compatible before I committed to what I thought was going to be a lifetime with one person.

Did you hear how that sounded in your head before you typed it out, Jaskier?

[treblemaking]

That's actually very smart. I wish more people did that. Mayhaps you should write a book to liberate housewives.

You're right, I'm sorry. Clearly, the protagonist was your liking my chest hair.

[doesntsing]

What do you think I’m trying to do with my comedy?

It’s true. I did like your chest hair. I wasn’t expecting it, nor was I expecting all those muscles in your chest and stomach.

About your cock… do you know about circumcision?

[treblemaking]

Nothing says you can't do both.

So when you think about it, we like each other's tits. I'm afraid I don't know that word, but please, tell me more about my cock.

[doesntsing]

I’ll stick to stand up for now. I like performing.

I guess we do. I couldn’t keep my hands off of you.

It’s a practice where a baby boy’s foreskin is removed from his penis. Different cultures and religions here practice it, including Jews. It’s an ancient practice and it’s considered a rite of passage in the Jewish religion. It’s actually becoming more popular amongst non-Jews in the US because it’s considered more hygienic and can help prevent some venereal diseases.

All that to say, I had never seen an uncircumcised penis before I saw yours.

[treblemaking]

fuck

Alright, give him a second, he almost dropped the device in the water.

I actually know what you mean. Kind of. I didn't know the name, or the details. But I've met a few guys in Rainbow Road like that. It almost killed the night the first time I saw it, I was quite disturbed.

So you... did that to Ethan?

[doesntsing]

Yes. He was 8 days old and the mohel numbed the area before he did it.

[treblemaking]

I see.

Eight days old. Fuck. Jaskier drank directly from the bottle again, this time to drown the mental image. He takes a moment to relax before writing again, not wanting to send this conversation to hell with just one message. He promised respect after all - but man, this is truly testing him.

Well, then. I'm glad my cock became the sample of what a complete man looks like.

[doesntsing]

Tread lightly, Jaskier.

Circumcised men are not incomplete. Both of the previous dicks that I experienced worked just as well as yours.

We may need to agree to disagree on this.

Midge has no regrets about circumcising her child; if she had another boy, she’d circumcise him too. It’s prescribed for Jewish men in the Torah. It just is.

Jaskier isn’t Jewish though and she doesn’t care if he’s uncircumcised. It didn’t stop her from sleeping with him. Differing views on circumcision would be a dumb thing to end this friendship over.

[ OOC: imagine if Abe had physically caught them and seen Jaskier’s dick and instantly known he wasn’t Jewish. Yikes. ]

laughing so hard at the idea of Abe freaking out not because of the lover, but because of the dick

[treblemaking]

Well, so much for trying to keep things cool.

...I was trying to make a joke.

A pause. A sigh.

I should get my arse to dinner. See you tomorrow?

that’s exactly what would happen lololol

[doesntsing]

It didn’t land.

That’s the one problem with communicating like this. Tone and intention are lost sometimes.

Enjoy your dinner. I’ll see you tomorrow.

[treblemaking]

She agrees they'll see each other, yet the conversation ends far from well and it won't leave Jaskier's mind. Is it already oveR? It'd be a new record for him. He waits until the next day to write again.

Many a artist have pre-show rituals. Does that affect comedians too?

[doesntsing]

Admittedly, Midge wasn’t happy with what Jaskier was implying the previous night, whether it was supposed to be a joke or not. She wants to afford him some grace though. He’s an Otherworlder, and even she can see how someone with no concept of circumcision would find it alarming. Therefore, when he texts her the next day, she’s no longer upset.

You mean other than downing a martini?

I guess the only ritual that Susie and I have is that we tell each other ‘tits up’ before I go onstage. What about you?

And how are you today?

[treblemaking]

A sigh of relief escapes his lips as soon as he sees her text. Thank goodness things are fine.

"Tits up"? Oh, I love this. Absolute perfection. Confident, encouraging, AND sexy! A threat on all fronts.

Me? I down a drink sometimes, too, but those got rarer with the years. (Rarer before a performance, I mean. I'm still an avid drinker.) If Geralt is around, I send him to sniff the audience, then I know what to expect.

He has something with his fingers since they got burned during torture, but he doesn't want to talk about that.

I'm well. Getting ready to spend most of the day arguing with a bunch of old men about what counts as "fair payment" for magical services. And you?

The uncut dick was too good for her to quit talking to him

[doesntsing]

I thought you might like it.

Geralt is sounding increasingly like a dog. What is he sniffing out?

Is that on Geralt’s behalf?

I’m getting ready to argue with children about whether putting pants on is a good idea.

lmao priorities

[treblemaking]

His "clan" is the wolves, so close enough. He can sniff tons of stuff, like level of intoxication, and you already know about the arousal. He can get an idea of the general mood, too. His ears are as good as his nose, so he picks up important bits of conversation, in case there's something I shouldn't sing about.

On behalf of the family. Geralt and Yennefer aren't the most social or pleasant people, so I do all the talking and negotiation. (And damage control.) Cirilla sometimes helps them, but we've been trying to keep her in school.

I'm afraid I shall be on the side of your children - lounging in your underwear can be quite relaxing.

exactly

[doesntsing]

That’s actually useful.

Using that silver tongue of yours for good?

Unfortunately we aren’t lounging though. We’re running errands.

[treblemaking]

For the good of our wallets. But I guess we're saving people's lives too. We're good at that.

Oh. Then have you considered that they're doing no-pants fashion to avoid going?

It's the kidn of shit he would do as a kid.

[doesntsing]

Are you? I guess your tongue has more good uses than I thought.

Very much so. That’s exactly why they’re doing it.

[treblemaking]

You've only seen the beginning of what my tongue can do.

Do you actually need them for the errands? Because this little pants problem can be easily solved without stress by leaving the kids at home. You have free nannies after all.

[doesntsing]

Is that so? Are you going to show me?

True, Mama is here. They’re going with their father tonight though so they need to put pants on at some point.

Can I ask you something?

Should I be planning to stay at the Goldbergs’ apartment tonight?

[treblemaking]

I promised my witty lady, did I not?

Does your ex pick them up? Let it be his problem.

I suppose that will depend on how the date goes, and your mood after the gig. I won't lie and say I'm not up for it, though.

[doesntsing]

You did, my sweet bard. I look forward to it. I haven’t stopped thinking about your tongue since yesterday.

They need to be dressed when he gets here though. I’ll wrestle them into pants later.

I’m going to choose to be optimistic. What’s your favorite color?

[treblemaking]

He sincerely doubts that, considering how they finished their chat last night. But hey, not gonna complain.

Oh, my. Be careful, I wouldn't want you to accidentally moan over breakfast with your parents (hilarious as it could be).

You need to relax before your show. Let him do the wrestling, it's the least he can do.

"Optimistic" sounds very promising. My favorite color is yellow/gold, but blue is a close second.