doesntsing | open post

"There must be a hole where the eggs come out, right?" He shakes his head, but he's amused. "Glad to see the sailors making up crap to justify their sea craziness is a constant in every world, though. I could fill an entire book with just their stories."

He chuckles and kisses Midge's cheek. "If you get to keep your beautiful face and your amazing tits, then yeah, I'd love you being my mermaid."

At that moment, an answer arrives from Geralt. Jaskier laughs at it before showing it to Midge.

Humans in this world are really desperate to find a justification to fuck monsters.

Midge puts her arms up. “I don’t think ours lay eggs?” She says questioningly. “But they’re not real anyway.”

They continue walking, Midge holding onto Jaskier’s arm. “We can sew me a little fish tail. If you want me to be your topless mermaid though, that will have to be for your eyes only.”

She snorts a laugh at Geralt’s response. “More likely sailors were trying to justify what they were doing while they were out at sea.”

"That's be adorable. Mayhaps you can be my mermaid and I shall be your sailor for Samhain."

He's learned about the whole deal with the costumes, and he can't wait. Geralt isn't as excited for Halloween, since he wonders if the whole deal about spirits being out and about during the night is true.

"That too, but I get what he means. We've noticed that many horror stories have erotic undertones, and many monster legends here are just humans with animal parts. I thought Geralt loved horses, but whoever invented centaurs takes the cake."

Her eyes get wide with excitement. “Yes! Though we might have to figure out how to make it a walking fish tail. Otherwise I guess you’d have to park me on the couch for the night.”

Midge hasn’t dressed up for Halloween in years, but being with Jaskier means that he’s trying to get her to have fun again, something that she appreciates.

“Oh… you mean like King Kong and Fay Wray? I never thought about that.”

"We'll figure it out. There's no fucking way I'm spending Samhain inside after all I heard. I want to see all the costumes and the candy on the street."

And Geralt will want to patrol, so it all works out. They can be a happy little group of weirdos.

"That's the big monkey, right? Because yes, that's exactly what I mean! Did you see her torn clothes? They weren't being subtle. And don't get me started on the penetration parallels of Dracula's bite. Great book, by the way. Loved the prose and the way the description of vampires annoyed Geralt."

“I guess that’s fair. You never got to go trick-or-treating as a kid.” Midge can see him now, forcing Ciri to go up to houses and ask for candy and then taking half of it at the end of the night.

Maybe her kids can come along too, if Jaskier is comfortable with that. Then she can hopefully pack them off to Joel’s after trick-or-treating.

“How would they have had sex though?” Midge makes a face, not wanting to think about the poor woman. “So vampires were real too? Not as sexual, I guess. More Nosferatu than Dracula?”

"Nope." He makes the P-sounds pop extra hard. "And I now have the sweetest piece of candy to show off." He kisses her temple, proud of his own corniness.

"I'm not sure," he admits after thinking about it for a second. "Maybe the big monkey only uses his tongue?" It's disturbing but it also makes Jaskier curious. "Most vampires in my world are monstrous-looking. But there's also a very exclusive handful that are powerful enough to take on a human form. Those can get sexual sometimes to attract prey."

There's a pause before he finally admits- "You saw the scar on my ribs."

“Sickeningly sweet,” Midge comments. Like she doesn’t love it.

Midge scrunches her nose. “Okay, now you’re putting images in my head that I would rather not have,” she says. His last comment is concerning though.

“Yeah…” She blinks. “Were you used as bait?”

Jaskier has described himself that way before when going monster hunting with Geralt.

"You're welcome." He loves putting images in her head.

Then he laughs at her theory. "Oh, goodness, no. Being bait would've been a story of bravery; this one is just ridiculous." Is it, Jaskier? Or is it just you being you? "I picked up this lovely lady at a party - great conversation, even greater tits. They were almost bursting out of her corset! So of course, we found a room aaaaand-" Pause for dramatics. "She tried to sucked me dry. And not the fun kind of sucking." He shakes his head. "Geralt saved me just in time. The scar is from her claws."

Midge bites her lip to keep from laughing, mostly because it sounds like a traumatic experience for him and she doesn’t want to laugh at his pain. But it’s pretty funny.

“Serves you right, being distracted by those great tits. I’m sure she didn’t have to work too hard to get you into bed.”

"So you can distract me with your tits but she can't? That's a double standard, missy!"

Not the best comment to make as they enter the hotel. It doesn't help that he gasps dramatically at the rest. "Miriam! Did you just call me a slut? I'm offended! Offended I say!"

“It sure is,” she replies. A bell boy in the lobby looks up at the two of them as they enter. Making a scene as always. “And I didn’t call you a slut. I implied it. Now I’m calling you a slut.”

Leaning in, she gives him a long kiss on his cheek.

"You are a very rude lady," he teases with a grin, enjoing the fact she's comfortable with PDA. He wonders how that will go the rest of the weekend.

As soon as the elevator doors close behind her, Jaskier pulls her close to devour her mouth.

Midge makes a noise of surprise as he grabs her. She returns the kiss, putting her arms around him carefully so that she doesn’t smack him with her shopping bags.

The elevator door opens on their floor and Midge pulls back from him. “Want to have a quickie before we go down to the beach?” she murmurs to him.

They have to take off their clothes to change anyway, and she knows that Jaskier finds it hard to control himself when she’s naked.

"You read my mind," he replies with a pleased smile. "I've missed you."

In the room, he rushes to drop his bags and satchel on the bed while toeing his shoes off on the way. He waits until Midge has done the same to wrap his arms around her and kiss her again, making it last this time. He tastes her thoroughly and sucks on her tongue before finally letting go.

"I can taste the sunshine on your lips." He tilts his head. "Should we take a quick shower to wash the horse off?"

Midge has missed him too. She loves that she gets to be with him here though. No hiding from her family, no matter how they might feel about her dating someone like Jaskier. The kiss is long and passionate, stirring her arousal and making her want more.

She gives him at sniff at his suggestion. “Probably… though we’ll want to shower after we come up from the beach too. I think you just want me naked and wet.”

"I mean, yes, I always want you naked and wet. But also, if we fuck we'll have to wash up before leaving anyway. And most importantly - I enjoy washing you."

He loves grooming his lovers - it's a different, very special kind of intimacy. And it means even more with Midge, who is very protective of her looks (and for a good reason!). It's an honor for him that she lets him put his hands in her hair.

Jaskier starts gently pushing her toward the bathroom while kissing her again.

"I hope we make use of the tub this weekend, too."

“Oh you do?” she asks innocently. “Why don’t you show me, then?”

Midge takes off her hat, then pulls her shirt up over her head. After toeing off her shoes, she unbuttons her pants and pushes them down.

“I hope so too. It’s a nice hot tub.”

Jaskier follows her lead, getting rid of everything except his underwear before they make it to the bathroom. Here, he finally lets go of her to get the shower water running.

"Have I told you how gorgeous you are today?" he asks before kissing her neck while taking off her bra.

“Not yet,” Midge replies, tilting her head so that Jaskier can kiss her neck. She’s going to try to be a bit more cognizant of hickies in visible places this weekend. “Very rude of you to forget.”

She watches them in the mirror as Jaskier unhooks her bra and pushes the straps down her shoulders.

As much as Jaskier would love to annoy the family, he meant it when he said he wants this to be a nice weekend, so he won't be leaving any visible hickeys. He doesn't even use teeth to tease; he just kisses her as his arms wrap around her to play with her now exposed breasts.

"Truly terrible of me." He buries his mouth in her ear as his groin starts rubbing against her arse. "She smiles, and roses awaken. / The garden listens, the sparrows sing. / Even silence bends its head, / to honor such blossoming grace."

Midge sighs happily as she relaxes into his arms. His touch, his words, make her feel content.

“How do you come up with such poetry so quickly?” she asks as she rubs her ass against his cock.

Jaskier gasps and mumbles a fuck when she returns the rubbing. A playful Midge is a very sexy Midge.

"I'm a damn genius," he says before kissing her cheek. "But that one was an oldie."

His hand slides down her stomach and sneaks under her panties, but he's only teasing - his fingers barely brush her folds before he pulls her panties down. Once Midge steps out of them, Jaskier picks her up without warning and puts her under the shower.

“You have a way with words,” she admits. Being a person who also likes words, Midge thinks it’s very arousing how good of a poet and lyricist he is.

Her breath catches when his hand slips into her panties, and she can feel her pulse start to race. Just as she’s trying to angle his hand to touch her more thoroughly, Jaskier picks her up. With a yelp, she wraps her arms around him before she’s placed down in the shower.

“See? You are a big strong man.”

He laughs while taking off his underwear, revealing that his dick is starting to get hard.

"You're petite, there's a difference. You can make any man feel big and strong."

Then he joins her to kiss her under the water, letting his hands roam and looking for her favorite spots to be touched, which he's memorized by now. Midge without the high heels and the hairdo is even more petite and he loves the way he can envelop her with his body.

"How should I worship you first, my goddess? Hair or body?"

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happy new year!

you too!

(Writer unknown)

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