For Igor Conti

[doesntsing]

Susie Meyerson is not going to make it out of Europe alive. Midge is going to kill her and throw her body in the river.

The European leg of Midge’s tour has not been going as planned. Perhaps the people of the Old World don’t understand her humor, but even Midge can admit that it’s not that. She’s been off her game lately. Last night, she forgot to set up a punch line for one of her jokes and it was a disaster. Midge is distracted. She’s jet-lagged in a foreign country where she doesn’t speak the language, isn’t a fan of the food and is missing her kids back home. She’s stressed, and it’s showing in her work. An offhanded comment to her manager about how it’s been a while since she’s had sex sets into motion the events that are about to take place tonight.

Susie ultimately wants to make money, and if Midge’s reviews are bad, ticket sales will go down. In her mind, there’s a simple solution: Midge needs to get laid. Fortunately, they already know someone who can help with that.

Midge had met Igor after one of her shows and learned of what he did for a living. It’s intriguing, but Midge would never dream of hiring a gigolo for herself. Susie has no such hesitation, at least when it comes to Midge. She hires Igor for Midge for the whole night and tells Midge about it 30 minutes before he’s set to show up at her hotel room.

After calling Susie every name in the book, Midge runs around in a whirlwind trying to spruce herself up. She’s not going to have sex with him. No. That’s ridiculous. But they don’t have to! They can just talk. Igor will still get paid and everyone will go home happy. Once she’s satisfied with her appearance and the state of the hotel room, Midge pulls a small bottle of vodka from the mini bar and practically chugs it down. She’s reaching for the next one when there’s a knock at the door.

“Oh God,” she says aloud to no one. Susie dropped her bomb and then wisely fucked off.

With a deep breath, she opens the door.

Comments

[contigor]

"I would modestly disagree, but I have tried it. It is incredibly adorable." Well, that's the confirmation it did happen. And that not all of it was unpleasant.

"That is no problem, you can always get on top and take charge whenever you feel like it," it is more than once that shy clients explicitly stated they didn't like to get on top then suddenly changing their tune in the heat of it all. Counting with his fingers, he goes: "So no extreme pain, no extreme rough housing... What else?"

[doesntsing]

So the clown story is real? Not that Midge thought Igor would lie about it, but it seems so outrageous. She supposes that she can’t judge other people’s sexual desires, but he really goes above and beyond for his clients.

“That’s it… I suppose I can tell you to stop if I don’t like something?” Midge thinks he would easily oblige her. “Maybe I should tell you what I do want?” She bites her lip, pausing for a moment. “I… want you to fuck me with your fingers while you lick my clit.”

So much for them just talking all night.