She nods at his advice, assuming that it’s solid. He deals with this a lot more than she does, so he should know. Spider Man turns to go and Midge reaches out to grab his hand.
“Wait! I can thank you without having to see your face.”
Standing on her tiptoes, she presses a light kiss to his cheek. “Thank you for saving me,” she says. “Again.”
“Oh, you’re welcome!” Peter said, genuinely surprised at the kiss. It was completely chaste and he wasn’t jealous as “Peter” at all. Honestly if that made her feel better after all she’d been through then so be it.
“Definitely going to be taking you up on dibs,” he told her before giving her a bit of a salute and then jumping up to the ceiling. Instead of crawling though he stood up, walking backward like it was the most natural thing to do.
“Alright citizens, keep safe. Tellers, maybe get everyone some suckers, the adrenaline is about to wear off and the sugar will help. Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, out!”
Midge watches in wonder as he defies gravity. There’s no doubt that Spider Man is impressive to her. She’s curious to know more about him, though she hates that the two of them keep meeting at scenes of crimes where she is a victim. Maybe someday they’ll get to meet in another context.
Peter had been planning this for a while now. It was risky, anytime he was in close proximity to Midge as Spider-Man it was risky that she might figure out who he was. If she did it wouldn’t be the end of the world, he planned on telling her soon, but this was still a bit of fun.
He had told her that he couldn’t make her show tonight because there was a presentation at the observatory he wanted to go to. Which was true, there was one and he wanted to go to it but he was also okay missing it.
Instead he had snuck into her dressing room dressed as Spider-Man and kicked up his feet while waiting for her. Sneaking in had not been easy but he didn’t want to risk someone recognizing him as Peter. But it was going to be worth it, having him sitting there and holding a bouquet of white carnations. Fortunately as Peter he’d sent or brought Midge flowers plenty of times so it wasn’t like Peter was one-upping himself as Spider-Man.
While she doesn’t expect Peter to be at every show of hers, Midge has gotten used to knowing that he’s there, either backstage or in the audience. It’s a little disappointing when he has to miss one, but she understands. Of course, she told him that this was the night she was going to try out a lot of brand new material about their relationship, just to make him squirm. She did tell a few jokes about dating a younger man and maybe how much stamina he has in bed, but nothing too mortifying. It’s not like she used his name.
Midge heads back to her dressing room after her show in order to change and pack up her things. When she sees the figure sitting at her vanity, she jumps and lets out a startled cry. When she realizes that it’s Spider Man, she smiles at him.
“By waterspout, obviously,” he said, standing up and handing her the flowers he’d been holding. He wished that he’d been able to hear her set a bit more and if she did include a lot of stuff about their relationship. She’d checked with him about anything she was going to make material out of so he wasn’t worried about that. She was just really, really funny and he liked hearing her new stuff.
“But you’re not itsy bitsy,” she replies, a smile playing at her lips as she takes the flowers from him. “Thank you. They’re beautiful.” Peter didn’t send her any tonight, and while Midge doesn’t expect him to, she’s kind of grown accustomed to it. She’d missed seeing the bouquet on her vanity tonight.
Midge can’t believe that he actually came, in costume. Otherwise, she supposes she’d have no idea he was actually there.
“Only the best for you. And I know roses are usually considered the best but carnations actually last a lot longer so you’ll see them more often,” Peter pointed out. Entirely true and not something that he had told her as Peter Parker. He went with the more traditional roses or other flowers since he figured that was a little more what Midge liked.
“I didn’t get to really hear it tonight but I did another night. Not quite what I expected but it was really good.”
“A lot more jokes about you being at the scenes of crimes for one thing. But I guess that’s just something you do for me,” he kidded her. Honestly he was glad that she hadn’t been involved in anymore but Spider-Man wouldn’t get to see her otherwise.
“I half expected you to get caught up in a gambling ring right in stage or something. Also, did not see the language and sex jokes coming but it was all really good.”
“Mmhmm,” Midge says. “That’s our special thing, isn’t it? Do you want an appearance in one of my future sets?” She can absolutely write some jokes about him, but she figured that he wouldn’t want that kind of exposure, even if what she has to say is positive.
“Thank you,” she says without any embarrassment about the content of her jokes. This is who she is. “I don’t think any criminals would dare to come near me with you around.”
Whew, Midge saying anything was “their special thing” was kind of hot. Or maybe it was just that Peter thought that everything Midge did was really hot. Probably the latter. If Midge hadn’t been with someone and they really did meet like this who knows what would have happened between them just now.
“You’re free to make some jokes about me. Probably best not to make it seem like you know me. I’d hate for someone to think they could get to me through you,” he said, which was a genuine concern he had. “But say whatever you want, couldn’t be worse than anything the Bugle says.”
It was flirtatious, but Midge figures there’s no harm in that. He seems to be respectful of the fact that she has a boyfriend.
“Do you have enemies?” she asks. Midge imagines that most criminals aren’t fond of him. “My boyfriend works for The Bugle. He’s only a photographer, but maybe he can tell them to stop printing lies about you since you saved his girlfriend twice.”
She imagines that won’t really do much, but it’s worth a shot. Spider Man doesn’t deserve the negative press that he gets.
"Oh, that's your guy? The one that takes pictures of me so that the Bugle
has images to run for the horrible stories they write about me? 'Spider-Cad
Flirts With Taken Woman'," he said, gesturing with his hands. That had been
the headline after the whole bank thing. He actually found it
really amusing, especially when he got to tease Midge a little as Peter.
"But no, that's not a problem. I mean like actual criminals I'm responsible
for sending to prison."
Midge was pretty pissed about that headline, actually. They even named her. Susie said if they were going to do that, they at least should have mentioned that she was a comedian. All promotion is good promotion in her eyes.
“That caused so many issues,” she grumbles. Joel had seen it too, and he had no idea she was dating someone. Of course he had a million questions. Her parents had a million and one questions. Despite the fact that she wants to be a famous performer, she likes keeping her private life private.
With how serious she and Peter are getting, Midge knew that introducing him to everyone was coming soon, but she wanted it to be on her terms.
“Is that why you stay anonymous?” Midge didn’t even think of that.
“Yeah, sorry the editor-in-chief’s personal crusade against me affected you,” Peter said, genuinely regretting that. Honestly he didn’t care too much about what was printed about him, at least to an extent, but others should be left out of it.
“Oh yeah. It’s to keep my friends and family safe. And any potential romantic partners. Also the police would arrest me instantly if they knew who I was and where I lived.”
“It’s okay,” she says. Midge knows it wasn’t Spider Man’s fault. He can’t help what the press says about him anymore than she can help what is said about her.
“Is what you do technically illegal?” Midge asks. “Or are they just upset that you’re doing more to fight crime than they are?
“Do you have a romantic partner?” Midge has to ask, at least.
“Mmmm, gray area,” he said, wobbling his hand back and forth in a “kinda” motion. Honestly he wasn’t sure about the legality or not. A regular citizen could stop a crime if they wanted, couldn’t they? It didn’t really matter because he wouldn’t stop if it was illegal.
“Romantic partner? Well I do have dibs on a drop-dead gorgeous comedian and that’s all I need right now,” he said, which was true. Peter had dibs on Midge, right?
"They can arrest you for a gray area, but they have to charge you with something. If you haven't broken any laws, they'll have to release you." Don't ask how she knows that, Spider Man.
The corner of her mouth curls up in a smile. "You're content being second in line?" she asks. "I'd say you could probably take my boyfriend in a fight, but he's surprisingly strong."
Spider Man's body type is actually very similar to Peter's, now that she thinks about it.
“Yeah, after they’ve unmasked me and exposed who I am to the world so that my life is kinda ruined,” Peter said. He also didn’t trust that the police and the DA wouldn’t find something to charge him with. He was probably even guilty of a few things.
“Is he ‘lift a car’ surprisingly strong or ‘dodge a bullet’ fast? Wait if I fight him and win do I get to date you?”
“I guess you’re right,” Midge says, “but you’d think they’d want your help instead of seeing you as an enemy. You can really do all that?” Why wouldn’t the police or the FBI want to have someone who has those abilities working for them?
She laughs at the idea of Spider Man and Peter fighting over her, though the thought of two men fighting over her is delicious.
“You know, there’s something I find very attractive about you, but Peter’s such a swell guy. He’s very good to me.”
“All that and more. I am pretty amazing. Some would say spectacular even. Just like some people might say you’re marvelous. That’s me, I’m saying it,” Peter said with a nod. “The Spectacular Spider-Man and the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” had a good ring to it. Too bad that couldn’t go on the towel or something. But Peter did think she was marvelous and more.
“I’m sure he’s perfect acceptable,” he told her, sitting down in the chair before looking at her with chin hands. “Tell me more thought about how you think I’m very attractive?”
Midge laughs and shakes her head at his reaction. Somehow, he manages to make her flustered.
“He’s more than acceptable, I can promise you that.” If he thinks that’s an allusion to sex, he would be correct. “You’re obviously bold in a lot of ways. Very confident. I’m sure you know that confidence is sexy.”
Well, it was nice to hear that she said he was more than acceptable. He really did have the best girlfriend ever and to hear her brag on him him was a pretty big ego boost.
“Sexy confidence? I’ll take that. Plus women like a man in a suit, right? Speaking of confidence… how is yours? I wanted to offer to take you for a swing sometime.”
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“Wait! I can thank you without having to see your face.”
Standing on her tiptoes, she presses a light kiss to his cheek. “Thank you for saving me,” she says. “Again.”
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“Oh, you’re welcome!” Peter said, genuinely surprised at the kiss. It was completely chaste and he wasn’t jealous as “Peter” at all. Honestly if that made her feel better after all she’d been through then so be it.
“Definitely going to be taking you up on dibs,” he told her before giving her a bit of a salute and then jumping up to the ceiling. Instead of crawling though he stood up, walking backward like it was the most natural thing to do.
“Alright citizens, keep safe. Tellers, maybe get everyone some suckers, the adrenaline is about to wear off and the sugar will help. Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, out!”
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He had told her that he couldn’t make her show tonight because there was a presentation at the observatory he wanted to go to. Which was true, there was one and he wanted to go to it but he was also okay missing it.
Instead he had snuck into her dressing room dressed as Spider-Man and kicked up his feet while waiting for her. Sneaking in had not been easy but he didn’t want to risk someone recognizing him as Peter. But it was going to be worth it, having him sitting there and holding a bouquet of white carnations. Fortunately as Peter he’d sent or brought Midge flowers plenty of times so it wasn’t like Peter was one-upping himself as Spider-Man.
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Midge heads back to her dressing room after her show in order to change and pack up her things. When she sees the figure sitting at her vanity, she jumps and lets out a startled cry. When she realizes that it’s Spider Man, she smiles at him.
“How did you crawl in here?” she asks.
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“But see, I told you that I’d come.”
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Midge can’t believe that he actually came, in costume. Otherwise, she supposes she’d have no idea he was actually there.
“What did you think of my set?”
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“Only the best for you. And I know roses are usually considered the best but carnations actually last a lot longer so you’ll see them more often,” Peter pointed out. Entirely true and not something that he had told her as Peter Parker. He went with the more traditional roses or other flowers since he figured that was a little more what Midge liked.
“I didn’t get to really hear it tonight but I did another night. Not quite what I expected but it was really good.”
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Midge sits down next to him. “You came to another one of my shows?” she asks, surprised. Was it with his mask off? “What were you expecting?”
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“A lot more jokes about you being at the scenes of crimes for one thing. But I guess that’s just something you do for me,” he kidded her. Honestly he was glad that she hadn’t been involved in anymore but Spider-Man wouldn’t get to see her otherwise.
“I half expected you to get caught up in a gambling ring right in stage or something. Also, did not see the language and sex jokes coming but it was all really good.”
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“Thank you,” she says without any embarrassment about the content of her jokes. This is who she is. “I don’t think any criminals would dare to come near me with you around.”
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“You’re free to make some jokes about me. Probably best not to make it seem like you know me. I’d hate for someone to think they could get to me through you,” he said, which was a genuine concern he had. “But say whatever you want, couldn’t be worse than anything the Bugle says.”
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“Do you have enemies?” she asks. Midge imagines that most criminals aren’t fond of him. “My boyfriend works for The Bugle. He’s only a photographer, but maybe he can tell them to stop printing lies about you since you saved his girlfriend twice.”
She imagines that won’t really do much, but it’s worth a shot. Spider Man doesn’t deserve the negative press that he gets.
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"Oh, that's your guy? The one that takes pictures of me so that the Bugle has images to run for the horrible stories they write about me? 'Spider-Cad Flirts With Taken Woman'," he said, gesturing with his hands. That had been the headline after the whole bank thing. He actually found it really amusing, especially when he got to tease Midge a little as Peter.
"But no, that's not a problem. I mean like actual criminals I'm responsible for sending to prison."
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“That caused so many issues,” she grumbles. Joel had seen it too, and he had no idea she was dating someone. Of course he had a million questions. Her parents had a million and one questions. Despite the fact that she wants to be a famous performer, she likes keeping her private life private.
With how serious she and Peter are getting, Midge knew that introducing him to everyone was coming soon, but she wanted it to be on her terms.
“Is that why you stay anonymous?” Midge didn’t even think of that.
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“Oh yeah. It’s to keep my friends and family safe. And any potential romantic partners. Also the police would arrest me instantly if they knew who I was and where I lived.”
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“Is what you do technically illegal?” Midge asks. “Or are they just upset that you’re doing more to fight crime than they are?
“Do you have a romantic partner?” Midge has to ask, at least.
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“Mmmm, gray area,” he said, wobbling his hand back and forth in a “kinda” motion. Honestly he wasn’t sure about the legality or not. A regular citizen could stop a crime if they wanted, couldn’t they? It didn’t really matter because he wouldn’t stop if it was illegal.
“Romantic partner? Well I do have dibs on a drop-dead gorgeous comedian and that’s all I need right now,” he said, which was true. Peter had dibs on Midge, right?
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The corner of her mouth curls up in a smile. "You're content being second in line?" she asks. "I'd say you could probably take my boyfriend in a fight, but he's surprisingly strong."
Spider Man's body type is actually very similar to Peter's, now that she thinks about it.
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“Is he ‘lift a car’ surprisingly strong or ‘dodge a bullet’ fast? Wait if I fight him and win do I get to date you?”
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She laughs at the idea of Spider Man and Peter fighting over her, though the thought of two men fighting over her is delicious.
“You know, there’s something I find very attractive about you, but Peter’s such a swell guy. He’s very good to me.”
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“I’m sure he’s perfect acceptable,” he told her, sitting down in the chair before looking at her with chin hands. “Tell me more thought about how you think I’m very attractive?”
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“He’s more than acceptable, I can promise you that.” If he thinks that’s an allusion to sex, he would be correct. “You’re obviously bold in a lot of ways. Very confident. I’m sure you know that confidence is sexy.”
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“Sexy confidence? I’ll take that. Plus women like a man in a suit, right? Speaking of confidence… how is yours? I wanted to offer to take you for a swing sometime.”
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That long string he hangs from? Where is it even attached to? Can it hold the weight of two people? Midge is… dubious.
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