Peter had learned a while ago how to tap into the bank silent alarm lines that ran to the police station. He didn't go after all of them, that was just crazy, but when he was at home and he heard one go off near his apartment he donned his costume and was out the window in a flash. The robbers hadn't even gotten all that far into their robbery by the time he got there.
First thing is he took out the guy standing lookout for the police outside and then let himself in through the roof access and crawled along the ceiling. He almost couldn't believe his eyes when he saw Midge laying there on the ground, some thug making disgusting comments about her. Really, they needed to have a talk about not antagonizing bank robbers.
"Really? I feel like asshole is too kind," Peter called out as he dropped from the ceiling, firing webs from each wrist that stuck to the robbers' guns before yanking the weapons out of their hands. "They serve a valuable function in the body. Unlike these two guys."
"You're the asshole and I'm going to murder you!" one of the guys yelled, pulling out a knife and charging at Peter. The guy swung the knife a couple of times and Peter dodged easily. The thing about knives is you had to be careful because it was so easy for the person using it to hurt themselves with it.
"Hey crush, I just have to check... you didn't organize this bank robbery as a way to meet you again?" he asked, turning to look at Midge as the guy continued to swing at him and he dodged effortlessly.
Midge’s heart leaps when she sees Spider Man crawling across the ceiling. How is he doing that?? Even though there are two guys with guns, she feels much safer now that Spider Man is here.
Midge can’t believe that he’s actually flirting with her while one of the robbers comes at him with a knife. She stays still as a statue, wanting to help if the opportunity presents itself, but also not make the situation worse.
“Caught me,” she says, her voice wavering with fear. “You and I really need to stop meeting this way, Spider Man.”
“We could meet other places? Rooftop rendezvous with some candles and a bottle of wine?” he suggested.
Asshole #2 pulled out a knife of his own and Peter figured he had better wrap this up before the guys started taking hostages. He grabbed the wrist of the guy fighting him and squeezed, the thug letting out a yelp of pain. With one hand Peter lifted the guy up by his jacket, shook him around a bit and then threw him to the ground, webbing the guy there. Picking up the knife, he handed it to Midge.
“Here, don’t say I never gave you anything. Just keep looking gorgeous, I’ll be right back,” he told her before hopping over to deal with the other thug.
“I’m afraid you’re too late,” she tells him. “I’m a taken woman.”
Midge watches as he makes quick work of the robber, and she’s got to say, even to herself, that Spider Man is pretty impressive. He doesn’t seem real. She’s happily taken, but this guy? Is pretty attractive.
The knife being suddenly handed to her catches her by surprise. Midge sits up and grips the handle of the knife tightly. If the other robber got past Spider Man and came towards her, he’d get a knife to the calf.
Peter webbed the final bank robber to the ground and then made sure that the guns were all webbed together as well. He didn’t want anyone accidentally grabbing them or them going off on accident. As much as he would like to just flirt with Midge he didn’t want to risk anyone’s safety.
“Alright everyone, I think you can stand up now if you feel like it. If the floor seems like a more comfortable place right now that’s okay too. The police should be here soon,” he said, heading over to Midge and holding his hand out for the knife. From the way she was holding it she might be more of a danger to herself.
“So… how serious is it? Like… odds are decent that it might not last and you’ll be available?”
"Yes! Dibs is exactly it. I have a job and my own place and am hygienic. Which I think makes me at least like a 7 out of 10 in New York, right?" Peter joked. Well, it was mostly a joke but from what Midge had told him dating standards in New York for men could be... low.
"But you have to tell me where I can meet you if you're not going to keep getting caught up in crimes."
“An 8,” she agrees with a nod. Flirting with him is helping her take her mind off what just happened, but Midge is feeling more shook up about this robbery than she did about her purse being snatched. The men had guns and one of them threatened to sexually assault her. She’s visibly trembling.
"Hey, hey. Everything is okay. It was really, really scary there for a moment but you're okay," he reassured her, reaching a hand out to rub her arm in what he hoped was a comforting manner. It was hard not to just hug her close but he had to remember that he was mostly a stranger to her like this.
"Stand up comedian. I know you hear this a lot but I've got a joke you can use in your act. Wanna hear it?"
Midge lets out a shaky breath, then takes a handkerchief from her purse to dab at her eyes. She hates crying in front of people. Guess it’s good that she can’t see Peter’s face.
“Let’s hear it,” she says, sure that it’s going to be a horrible joke. She loves bad jokes.
"So, Spider-Man is a pretty accurate name but I think if I had to do it all over again I'd go for something less gross and creepy, you know? Something like Spider-Puppy," he said, grinning under his mask. He was pretty proud of that joke and had a feeling that it would hit just right with Midge.
Midge tries not to laugh but fails. It’s actually more clever than she thought it would be. “I think the two you’ve got stuck to the floor are the poster children for gross and creepy men.”
She smiles at him. There’s something very attractive about him that Midge can’t quite put her finger on. She might be more open to his advances if she didn’t have Peter.
“I was going to invite you to one of my shows, but how will I know if you’re really there?”
Well, he got a laugh, which he considered pretty high praise coming from Midge. He was definitely going to be holding her close tonight as Peter though because this was definitely traumatizing, no matter how well she was holding herself together.
"Oh, I'll make sure you know. Just tell me where and give me a couple of times and I'll see what I can do."
Midge tells him the dates, times and locations of some of her upcoming shows.
“You’re really not going to let me see your face?” she asks, trying to bat her eyelashes just a little. “How can I thank you if you won’t let me see you?”
“You are not nearly as taken as you say if you need access to my face to thank me properly,” Peter teased. He knew that Midge wasn’t saying that she would kiss him but he couldn’t help it. Plus it wasn’t like he didn’t get offers like that from time-to-time.
“But I need to head out before the police show up. Just some advice… if someone wants your money… just let them have it without insulting them, that just makes it worse. Mugging? Let them having it. Kidnapping? Fight like hell.”
She nods at his advice, assuming that it’s solid. He deals with this a lot more than she does, so he should know. Spider Man turns to go and Midge reaches out to grab his hand.
“Wait! I can thank you without having to see your face.”
Standing on her tiptoes, she presses a light kiss to his cheek. “Thank you for saving me,” she says. “Again.”
“Oh, you’re welcome!” Peter said, genuinely surprised at the kiss. It was completely chaste and he wasn’t jealous as “Peter” at all. Honestly if that made her feel better after all she’d been through then so be it.
“Definitely going to be taking you up on dibs,” he told her before giving her a bit of a salute and then jumping up to the ceiling. Instead of crawling though he stood up, walking backward like it was the most natural thing to do.
“Alright citizens, keep safe. Tellers, maybe get everyone some suckers, the adrenaline is about to wear off and the sugar will help. Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, out!”
Midge watches in wonder as he defies gravity. There’s no doubt that Spider Man is impressive to her. She’s curious to know more about him, though she hates that the two of them keep meeting at scenes of crimes where she is a victim. Maybe someday they’ll get to meet in another context.
Peter had been planning this for a while now. It was risky, anytime he was in close proximity to Midge as Spider-Man it was risky that she might figure out who he was. If she did it wouldn’t be the end of the world, he planned on telling her soon, but this was still a bit of fun.
He had told her that he couldn’t make her show tonight because there was a presentation at the observatory he wanted to go to. Which was true, there was one and he wanted to go to it but he was also okay missing it.
Instead he had snuck into her dressing room dressed as Spider-Man and kicked up his feet while waiting for her. Sneaking in had not been easy but he didn’t want to risk someone recognizing him as Peter. But it was going to be worth it, having him sitting there and holding a bouquet of white carnations. Fortunately as Peter he’d sent or brought Midge flowers plenty of times so it wasn’t like Peter was one-upping himself as Spider-Man.
While she doesn’t expect Peter to be at every show of hers, Midge has gotten used to knowing that he’s there, either backstage or in the audience. It’s a little disappointing when he has to miss one, but she understands. Of course, she told him that this was the night she was going to try out a lot of brand new material about their relationship, just to make him squirm. She did tell a few jokes about dating a younger man and maybe how much stamina he has in bed, but nothing too mortifying. It’s not like she used his name.
Midge heads back to her dressing room after her show in order to change and pack up her things. When she sees the figure sitting at her vanity, she jumps and lets out a startled cry. When she realizes that it’s Spider Man, she smiles at him.
“By waterspout, obviously,” he said, standing up and handing her the flowers he’d been holding. He wished that he’d been able to hear her set a bit more and if she did include a lot of stuff about their relationship. She’d checked with him about anything she was going to make material out of so he wasn’t worried about that. She was just really, really funny and he liked hearing her new stuff.
“But you’re not itsy bitsy,” she replies, a smile playing at her lips as she takes the flowers from him. “Thank you. They’re beautiful.” Peter didn’t send her any tonight, and while Midge doesn’t expect him to, she’s kind of grown accustomed to it. She’d missed seeing the bouquet on her vanity tonight.
Midge can’t believe that he actually came, in costume. Otherwise, she supposes she’d have no idea he was actually there.
“Only the best for you. And I know roses are usually considered the best but carnations actually last a lot longer so you’ll see them more often,” Peter pointed out. Entirely true and not something that he had told her as Peter Parker. He went with the more traditional roses or other flowers since he figured that was a little more what Midge liked.
“I didn’t get to really hear it tonight but I did another night. Not quite what I expected but it was really good.”
“A lot more jokes about you being at the scenes of crimes for one thing. But I guess that’s just something you do for me,” he kidded her. Honestly he was glad that she hadn’t been involved in anymore but Spider-Man wouldn’t get to see her otherwise.
“I half expected you to get caught up in a gambling ring right in stage or something. Also, did not see the language and sex jokes coming but it was all really good.”
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First thing is he took out the guy standing lookout for the police outside and then let himself in through the roof access and crawled along the ceiling. He almost couldn't believe his eyes when he saw Midge laying there on the ground, some thug making disgusting comments about her. Really, they needed to have a talk about not antagonizing bank robbers.
"Really? I feel like asshole is too kind," Peter called out as he dropped from the ceiling, firing webs from each wrist that stuck to the robbers' guns before yanking the weapons out of their hands. "They serve a valuable function in the body. Unlike these two guys."
"You're the asshole and I'm going to murder you!" one of the guys yelled, pulling out a knife and charging at Peter. The guy swung the knife a couple of times and Peter dodged easily. The thing about knives is you had to be careful because it was so easy for the person using it to hurt themselves with it.
"Hey crush, I just have to check... you didn't organize this bank robbery as a way to meet you again?" he asked, turning to look at Midge as the guy continued to swing at him and he dodged effortlessly.
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Midge can’t believe that he’s actually flirting with her while one of the robbers comes at him with a knife. She stays still as a statue, wanting to help if the opportunity presents itself, but also not make the situation worse.
“Caught me,” she says, her voice wavering with fear. “You and I really need to stop meeting this way, Spider Man.”
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Asshole #2 pulled out a knife of his own and Peter figured he had better wrap this up before the guys started taking hostages. He grabbed the wrist of the guy fighting him and squeezed, the thug letting out a yelp of pain. With one hand Peter lifted the guy up by his jacket, shook him around a bit and then threw him to the ground, webbing the guy there. Picking up the knife, he handed it to Midge.
“Here, don’t say I never gave you anything. Just keep looking gorgeous, I’ll be right back,” he told her before hopping over to deal with the other thug.
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Midge watches as he makes quick work of the robber, and she’s got to say, even to herself, that Spider Man is pretty impressive. He doesn’t seem real. She’s happily taken, but this guy? Is pretty attractive.
The knife being suddenly handed to her catches her by surprise. Midge sits up and grips the handle of the knife tightly. If the other robber got past Spider Man and came towards her, he’d get a knife to the calf.
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Peter webbed the final bank robber to the ground and then made sure that the guns were all webbed together as well. He didn’t want anyone accidentally grabbing them or them going off on accident. As much as he would like to just flirt with Midge he didn’t want to risk anyone’s safety.
“Alright everyone, I think you can stand up now if you feel like it. If the floor seems like a more comfortable place right now that’s okay too. The police should be here soon,” he said, heading over to Midge and holding his hand out for the knife. From the way she was holding it she might be more of a danger to herself.
“So… how serious is it? Like… odds are decent that it might not last and you’ll be available?”
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A smile plays at her lips when Spider Man immediately resumes flirting with her. “Are you calling dibs?” she asks.
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"But you have to tell me where I can meet you if you're not going to keep getting caught up in crimes."
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“I, um… I’m a stand up comedian…”
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"Stand up comedian. I know you hear this a lot but I've got a joke you can use in your act. Wanna hear it?"
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“Let’s hear it,” she says, sure that it’s going to be a horrible joke. She loves bad jokes.
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"So, what do you think? Not bad, right?"
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She smiles at him. There’s something very attractive about him that Midge can’t quite put her finger on. She might be more open to his advances if she didn’t have Peter.
“I was going to invite you to one of my shows, but how will I know if you’re really there?”
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"Oh, I'll make sure you know. Just tell me where and give me a couple of times and I'll see what I can do."
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“You’re really not going to let me see your face?” she asks, trying to bat her eyelashes just a little. “How can I thank you if you won’t let me see you?”
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“But I need to head out before the police show up. Just some advice… if someone wants your money… just let them have it without insulting them, that just makes it worse. Mugging? Let them having it. Kidnapping? Fight like hell.”
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“Wait! I can thank you without having to see your face.”
Standing on her tiptoes, she presses a light kiss to his cheek. “Thank you for saving me,” she says. “Again.”
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“Oh, you’re welcome!” Peter said, genuinely surprised at the kiss. It was completely chaste and he wasn’t jealous as “Peter” at all. Honestly if that made her feel better after all she’d been through then so be it.
“Definitely going to be taking you up on dibs,” he told her before giving her a bit of a salute and then jumping up to the ceiling. Instead of crawling though he stood up, walking backward like it was the most natural thing to do.
“Alright citizens, keep safe. Tellers, maybe get everyone some suckers, the adrenaline is about to wear off and the sugar will help. Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, out!”
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He had told her that he couldn’t make her show tonight because there was a presentation at the observatory he wanted to go to. Which was true, there was one and he wanted to go to it but he was also okay missing it.
Instead he had snuck into her dressing room dressed as Spider-Man and kicked up his feet while waiting for her. Sneaking in had not been easy but he didn’t want to risk someone recognizing him as Peter. But it was going to be worth it, having him sitting there and holding a bouquet of white carnations. Fortunately as Peter he’d sent or brought Midge flowers plenty of times so it wasn’t like Peter was one-upping himself as Spider-Man.
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Midge heads back to her dressing room after her show in order to change and pack up her things. When she sees the figure sitting at her vanity, she jumps and lets out a startled cry. When she realizes that it’s Spider Man, she smiles at him.
“How did you crawl in here?” she asks.
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“But see, I told you that I’d come.”
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Midge can’t believe that he actually came, in costume. Otherwise, she supposes she’d have no idea he was actually there.
“What did you think of my set?”
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“Only the best for you. And I know roses are usually considered the best but carnations actually last a lot longer so you’ll see them more often,” Peter pointed out. Entirely true and not something that he had told her as Peter Parker. He went with the more traditional roses or other flowers since he figured that was a little more what Midge liked.
“I didn’t get to really hear it tonight but I did another night. Not quite what I expected but it was really good.”
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Midge sits down next to him. “You came to another one of my shows?” she asks, surprised. Was it with his mask off? “What were you expecting?”
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“A lot more jokes about you being at the scenes of crimes for one thing. But I guess that’s just something you do for me,” he kidded her. Honestly he was glad that she hadn’t been involved in anymore but Spider-Man wouldn’t get to see her otherwise.
“I half expected you to get caught up in a gambling ring right in stage or something. Also, did not see the language and sex jokes coming but it was all really good.”
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